The new guy ordered a long black. He was tall, nonchalant, and wore the kind of button-down shirt that said, I have a Roth IRA and probably compost. He smiled politely, said thank you, and left a tip.

Jo didn’t trust him at all.

Over the next week, Mr. Normal, whose real name was Frank and whose job was as an urban planner in the next town over, kept showing up. He ordered sensible drinks, laughed at Jo’s sarcasm, and once offered to fix the café’s creaky back door just because it was squeaky and he “had a toolbox in the trunk of his car”.

Ducking behind the pastry case, she whispered to Matteo, “He’s normal. Like, aggressively normal. He asked me how my day was and he listened.”

“You made eye contact with a functional adult?”

“It was like staring into a void of emotional stability.”

Clorvex leaned over, mouth full of biscotti. “Maybe you’re the red flag.”

Jo threw a spoon at him and started panicking.

Frank was nice, reliable, and calm. He had no ancient curses, undead exes, or spectral baggage that anyone was aware of. The worst thing about him was that he recycled with aggressive cheerfulness.

It was unsettling.

Mira noticed first. “You’re folding napkins with intention.”

Jo snapped a pile in half. “I’m considering going on a date with someone with emotional bandwidth. Do you know what that means in this town?”

Matteo nodded grimly. “A curse.”

The Queen of the Hollow Moon materialized in a swirl of espresso mist and stared at Frank from across the café. “Who is that and why is he beige?”

Jo glared. “That’s Frank. He’s kind.”

“Terrifying,” the Queen agreed. “You need rescuing Jo.”

At that exact moment, the café lights flickered, and a bat swooped in. Through the doorway stepped the vampire that once called Jo his ‘daylight danger’. His eyes were gleaming with danger and drama.

“Someone said Jo needed saving?”

Jo stared at the vampire.

Frank turned to introduce himself, but the vampire just smiled faintly and said, “You’re the plot twist.”

Jo sighed into her mug. “I don’t know what’s happening anymore.”

Clorvex tossed her a heart-shaped stress ball. “Welcome to dating in Cedar Grove.”